Peter Like Denial

“Truly I tell you,” Jesus answered, “this very night, before the rooster crows, you will disown me three times.” Matthew 26:34

As I read Matthew 26:34, the idea of denying Jesus sent chills through my body. It made me question how I have denied Jesus myself. A sinner, just like Peter, someone who has witnessed miracles in her very own life, how have I resisted Jesus’s commands and teachings? If I am a professing Christian then I need to walk the walk. How have my actions said otherwise?

Is it…

Distraction?

Bitterness?

Resentment?

Unforgiveness?

Idolatry?

Busyness?

Gossip?

Slander?

Before the last supper Jesus foretold Peter’s betrayal. Peter would be asked three times to own Jesus as his friend, confidant, leader. Peter, one of Jesus’s first disciples which only meant that he was with Jesus the longest, was able to see more, hear more of, and witness Jesus and his ministry. 

When a servant girl asked Peter if he was with Jesus before his arrest in Luke 22:57b, Peter replies, “Woman, I do not know him.”  When Peter was asked if he was a disciple he replied, “Man, I am not.” Luke 22:58b. Finally in Luke 22:59, when a man insisted that Peter was with Jesus and was a Galilean, Peter replied, “Man, I do not know what you are talking about.” Within an hour, before the rooster crowed three times, in Jesus’s most vulnerable state, Peter denied knowing his Lord and savior.

How am I like Peter? Professing to be a Christian one minute but walking a different life the next?

Whatever it is that stands between Jesus and I must go. “Your kingdom come, Lord. My kingdom go.” It takes sacrifice, dying to self every single day. Making time and making room for God to work in and through my life. Building that strong foundation in Him and only Him, brick by brick. Allowing God to fill the deepest wounds, hurts, and emptiness, in my heart.

What is it that you think of when you first wake up in the morning? Do you reach for your phone, scroll through your social media posts, check on how many interactions you got? When the interactions aren’t there do you spiral into thoughts of being less than, not enough, not worthy? Let the rabbit hole commence. Spiraling thoughts of comparison, anxiety, unworthiness, overwhelm. Matthew 6:21 says, “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Those early morning thoughts tell us what we treasure. Is it notariety? Is it wealth or material things? Body image? The number on the scale? 

Are you harboring bitterness from a past hurt? Holding others in a prison cell of unforgiveness and resentment? Girl, I promise you, if this is the case you need to let go. I’m not saying you shouldn’t process the pain because there is healing in that. What I am saying is, acknowledge it, process it, peel back the onion, layer by layer. What are the pain points in your circumstance, what hurts most and why? Are the words or actions that have been done to you true, noble, praiseworthy, kind? If not, they are not of God. Stand firm in the fact that the pain they caused you says more about their heart issue than yours, then release it, forever and ever, Amen. Forgiving seventy times seven. Humbling yourself and seeing others through the eyes of our Creator. Your persecutor...they are fully loved and created for a purpose just like you. 

In Matthew 18:21, Peter asks Jesus how many times he should forgive his brother. Seven, he asks? Jesus replies, seven times seventy. Are you like me? Pulling out your calculator to see just how many times you have to forgive someone? 490! I am pretty sure Jesus didn’t want to give us an exact number. We are to forgive over and over. Because, sister friend, that bitterness and resentment leaves scars, holes, and ick that you weren’t meant to carry. Forgiveness let’s the captive free and that captive is you.

Will you take some time today to ask God to reveal where you may be denying Jesus subconsciously? What are you holding onto that needs to be let go? What do you think of when you wake up in the morning? Where are your treasures? How can you position God as your number one priority today?

Will you pray with me?

Dear Heavenly Father,

I want you to be first and most in my life. Help to see where I have placed other priorities before you. Where is it that I continually deny You? Allow me to see pockets of time where I can make room for You, get into your word, and revel in your promises, truths, and sacrificial love. Reveal any bitterness or resentment that I may carry. Help me work through those hurts, process the pain, and remind me that forgiveness of those circumstances will only bring me peace and closeness to You. Your Kingdom come, Lord. My kingdom go. Day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute. Help me to keep my eyes fixed on You. You first, Lord, in all that I do.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

God's Refinement in Suffering

6 “In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7 These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.” 1Peter 1:6-7

Social distancing, schools being canceled for months, extra curricular activities postponed until further notice, restaurants, salons, harbor shops, anything "non-essential" being forced to close, death tolls and the number of positive patients with the virus rising, and a threat of mandatory curfew lingering for many US cities. Suddenly, our schedules are quieted, the busyness swept away, we’ve been asked to stay home and wait out the storm. 

This is unchartered territory for those of us who have been slaves to an overwhelmed schedule. How will we choose to spend our time? Will we fall victim to the fear that is almost palpable in every media outlet we turn to? Or will we choose to find the peace and joy in our circumstances? 

In 1 Peter 1:6 Peter challenges us to find joy in our trials. He tells us that we will face many in our lifetime and along with those trials there will be grief and suffering. How do we find joy in the conditions we’ve been given? How do we find joy in isolation? 

We can choose to see our circumstances as a trial or we can see it as a blessing. Perhaps God is giving us this opportunity to reconnect, enjoy the simple things, and focus on the priorities that He wants to see front and center in our everyday lives. This freedom in our schedule opens up the opportunity to be super intentional about how we spend our days. For the moms who are able to stay home with her children during the weeks to come, maybe you schedule out your days in advance. You can bring back the basics that you learned to know and love as a child, pre-tablet, phone, and social media. Dust off the puzzles, books, and family recipes, roll up your sleeves and reconnect with your children. Have a quiet time together as a family. Easter is around the corner, dig out the children’s bible and delve in. Choose a story a day and choose a child to read that story, discuss it, and pray together. Make a prayer list. Who or what can you pray for in the weeks to come? Write them down and revisit them daily so that you can see God’s activity in and through this crisis. 

Peter goes on to say in verse 7, “These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith.” Many people will be watching. They want to see how a professing Christian will handle the anxiety and fear of the unknown. What happens when we show others that our trust and faith belongs to an all knowing, all loving, sovereign God? We have an opportunity to show others that church isn't about a building but a group of people who place their faith and hope in the unseen, the God of all creation. God has given us an open invitation to let go and lean in. To give our worries to Him. When we do, we give Him glory and His time to shine in and through us. 

At the end of verse 7, Peter states that when we cast our fears and anxieties on Him they “may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.” Friend, we have an opportunity to glorify Jesus in all of this. Whether we realize it or not, believers and non believers alike are looking for refuge in their worry. Will you take these circumstances as an opportunity to show them where they can place those fears? Will you show them that our God is Lord of your life? That you refuse to fall victim to fear? That worry has no place in the heart of a girl who loves the Lord with all their heart, mind, and soul? 

Dear Heavenly Father, 

Lord, thank you for choosing me for such a time as this. Thank you for your love, patience, kindness, and provisions. Thank you for shelter, food, health, and my precious family. I pray, Lord that you give me a spirit of power, strength, and endurance in the days to come. That you wash away any temptations to fall into a valley of fear. Give me the strength to refocus and realign my thoughts. Challenge me to find joy in the days and weeks to come. Thank you for the stillness of my schedule. May I fill them with meaningful connections with my family, inviting You into the center of each and every precious moment. Break my heart for what breaks Your's, Lord. Show me opportunities to be Your hands and feet. I know and trust that you are a God of provision. You’ve provided, comforted, restored areas in my life in the past and Lord I trust you will continue to do so in my future. 

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

When God Quiets Our Schedules

Social distancing, it’s a foreign term, a phenomena that we’ve never had the opportunity to navigate. Schools are canceled until further notice, the babies are home, you want to be intentional about the time you get with them over the next couple of weeks. What does that look like? How do we fill that time with meaningful, intentional, family time with our children? 

Here are some of the things my husband and I have come up with....

• Quiet time-start the the morning with quiet time as a family. We LOVE the "Jesus Storybook Bible." It's been our favorite for 14 years. Take some time and begin your day with reading God's word and praying together as a family.
• Read-together in the same room for a certain amount of time. Set a timer (for us it will be 1 hour). Share what you have read.
• Write a note, letter of encouragement-have each child choose a recipient of an encouraging, hand written note. Help them write it if necessary and send it. Yes, snail mail. Who doesn't enjoy a sweet, little surprise in their mailbox?
• Bake-have each child Pinterest a recipe they'd like to try (grocery store pick up is where it's at).
• Make dinner together-allow the children to create your dinner menu and cook it together. Make it big and fancy, dinner plates, place settings, napkins. Sit down and eat as a family. Pray, have intentional conversations. Talk about their fears with regards to the world around them right now. We are no longer a slave to an extra curricular schedule, take advantage of this.
• Get outside- walk, run, ride bikes, go in the woods and explore (my kids like to build forts in the woods behind our home, find "fossils", bugs, worms, all the squirmy, slimy things), we plan to plant some seeds and watch them grow over the coming weeks as well. 
• Play board games-each day assign a child to choose a board game they'd like to play with the family.
• Write-a short story, here are writing prompts for young children https://www.journalbuddies.com/journal_prompts__journal_topics/story-writing-prompts-for-kids/, middle schoolers https://www.journalbuddies.com/creative-writing-2/creative-story-ideas-for-middle-schoolers/, high schoolers https://topicsmill.com/short-story/short-story-ideas-for-high-school/.

• Paint, draw, color-the key is to be in the same room, together as a family, you don't have to be doing the same thing. My kids enjoy different media (4 kids, 4 different personalities and interests) It's presence that matters.
• Put a puzzle together (a BIG one)-I remember back in the day, my grandmother would always have a large puzzle with tons of pieces in progress in the living room on a card table. We would love to visit and help her create her little masterpiece. 
• Dance party-when you just need to get jiggy with it, break it down!

• Chores-put them to work! They want to help. It makes them feel like they've accomplished things. 
• All things Disney+-Sorry, the Disney lover in me had to! I am pretty sure there are some classics that we could revisit as a family. Choose one a night. Alternating which family member gets to choose. I find that creating a calendar (I do all things in birth order) alleviates arguments in advance! I printed this one https://www.betacalendars.com/march-calendar.html/printable-march-2020-calendar.
• Journal-at the end of the day, sit down as a family and journal. What was special about the day? What did they enjoy most? How did they extend love and kindness today? Who showed them kindness? What is one thing they'd like to do tomorrow?

In all the uncertainty, God has quieted our schedules. That's a blessing in and of itself. I challenge you, mama, if you can and if you have the ability, make this time count. We have an opportunity to take this time to be super intentional, get back to basics, and enjoy the simple, yet precious things.

Stay well, friend! 

XOXOXOXO,

Trudy

Be a Super Sleuth

“Mom, where are my shin guards?”

“Mom, do you know where my turn shoes are?” 

“Hey Mims (that’s what my 14 year old calls me), do you know where a charger is?”

My newest response? “Be a Super Sleuth!”

That phrase comes from a Disney Junior show called, “My Friends Tigger and Pooh” where a team consisting of Pooh, Piglet, Eeyore, Darby, and Buster go on sleuthing adventures and investigations throughout the Hundred Acre Wood. It resonates with my older children because they grew up watching this sweet little show. 

In parenting, the easy button isn’t always the best option. Giving into our kids when they’re throwing a tantrum in the middle of the candy aisle may make them quiet for the time being but what happens the next time we are in that very same aisle? Are we going to continue encouraging the tantrum or be the adult when it’s hard, set boundaries, and expectations?

The easy button and coddling feels good! It makes us feel accomplished in the realm of mommyhood. It allows us to be the hero in the eyes of our children. In a world where we are constantly comparing our kid’s science projects to someone else’s beautiful Pinterest worthy approach, we want to measure up. Keeping up with the Karens. 

Confession, up until my recent discovery of how I was raising my kids, I did practically everything under the sun for them. It wasn’t until I began listening to podcasts about helicopter and lawn mower parenting that I realized that I wasn’t doing my kids any justice by solving their every problem and filling their every need. My job is to equip, prepare, and encourage my children to navigate this big scary world on their own. I can’t be their side kick all the days of their lives and I absolutely don’t want to be. 

In Julie Lythcott-Haims book, “How to Raise an Adult” she talks about how parents over involve themselves to the point of following up on college interviews themselves, uprooting their lives to live near college campuses, and approaching professors to question their children’s grades. As parents we want to see our kids succeed so we go to great lengths to ensure they do so. Sometimes crossing boundaries and lines. In the process we aren’t equipping our children and empowering them to be their very own advocates. 

A recent epipheME (that’s what I call a personal revelation)...my oldest is 14, a freshman in high school, a perfectly capable human being. I was still making his lunch everyday before he went to school. I hadn’t given him the opportunity to make his own lunch. I wanted to have the satisfaction of making it, writing a perfect little inspirational quote for him to find each day, and feel super special in doing so. My excuse, he’s a vegetarian and there aren’t vegetarian options at school. I need to make sure he has something to eat. Reality...he is, and has been perfectly capable of making his lunch for quite some time. I NEEDED to let go of the reigns. Give my kids the tools to succeed, sit back, and PRAY that God work in and through my absence.

When I let go, I give my kids independence and an opportunity to figure things out on their own. An opportunity for self motivation and to be empowered by the decisions they get to make all by themselves, which my 14 year old applauded me for later. He said he was thankful that I was giving him space and an opportunity to figure things out on his own. 

So mama, I get it! I want to make things super easy for my kids. I don’t ever want them to feel like they are struggling, alone, or anxious or scared but when I give them the tools to navigate life’s throws, I give them an opportunity to celebrate their very own triumphs.

Dear Girl Who Feels Unlovable Today,

“We glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”

‭‭Romans‬ ‭5:3-5‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Valentine’s Day is HARD! You look around, see the flowers, chocolates, candy, love letters, couples blissfully in love and wonder if you’ll ever be on the receiving end of someone showing you this type of affection. The doubt creeps in, when will it be my turn? You may be dealing with thought patterns that tell you you are not enough, ugly, fat, not worthy of a relationship, alone, unseen. 

Can I ask you to take a step back? View yourself through the eyes of your Creator? God doesn’t see you through an Instagram filter, Instabeauty, or LightRoom. He doesn’t look at you and see imperfections and flaws. He looks at you through a lens of pride, that He made you uniquely you on purpose the moment He created you in your mother’s womb. He looks at you as an expression of Himself, unconditionally loved, perfect, a masterpiece, chosen. 

Picture a loving Father, approvingly watching His daughter from a distance, proud of the perfect being that He has made. That is you, sweet girl. Accepted, approved, noticed, important, valued, adored. 

So when thoughts creep in this Valentine’s Day that you’re alone, unworthy, or invisible, I want you to remember who you are in the eyes of God! 

Stop looking around and comparing yourself to someone else. Stop looking left and right and wishing you looked like her, dressed like her, were in a relationship like her, or as intelligent as her. Sweet girl, I promise she’s dealing with her own laundry list of insecurities. She’s playing her very own game of comparison. 

One day your prince will come, God’s timing is perfect! In the meantime, embrace today and know that you are LOVED, CHERISHED, CHOSEN, intentionally made for a purpose for such a time as this! What if today you fall in love with the girl God adores instead of focusing on who you’re not? 

Take some time today to journal, get in the word, listen to your favorite praise and worship song, play it LOUD, drown out the noise, pray and ask God to reveal His image of you right here, in this moment. What does He call you?

Dear Heavenly Father,

Today is a rough holiday for some of my dearest friends. I pray that you comfort the hearts of those that are longing for a love that only You can fulfill. Breathe life, love, reassurance into their loneliness. Affirm them so that they may know who they are in You. Give them validation that You are enough and because You are enough, they are enough. When they feel unloved, remind them Who you are, that You sent Your son to die and suffer on a cross because You love them just that much. 

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

Unpacking the Need to Be Skinny

The holidays are over, the parties have caught up with us and well, our clothes are a bit, okay, REALLY snug and the image in the mirror isn’t quite where you would like to be. New year, new you, right??? Commence the desire to find a quick fix, something that will get me where I want to be. The dream goal weight, the dream body image you’ve always wanted. 

As women we are constantly striving to look and feel our very best. A constant desire and void that was never meant to be filled by the desires of our flesh. A longing that will never be satisfied, leaving us relying on our own personal works to help fulfill an emptiness that only God can fill with His unrelenting, unconditional, immeasurable love and approval of us. 

What is at the root of that desire?

Why is enough never enough?

What keeps us striving for more?

Can we go back to the garden where the peace of our body image was robbed? (Did I just blow your mind, no coincidence that God had me here in Genesis on January 1, 2020) 

Genesis 3:1 Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from any tree in the garden’?” 

The moment Satan tempted Eve (by food of all things) marks the very beginning of our fleshly fall. 

Genesis 3:4 “You will not certainly die,” the serpent said to the woman. 5 “For God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.”

The evil lie planted from the serpent that relying on God wasn’t enough, the lie that we could somehow become our own gods. 

In that moment, we were robbed from our God given, childlike faith forever. A faith that solely relied on Him for our every single need or desire. 

Satan spewed lies and temptations. 

Eve fell into that temptation, immediately bringing about feelings of guilt and shame the moment she tasted the apple from the tree of knowledge of good and evil. 

When we take a moment to consider why we search for thin, skinny, and acceptance of others; the root of all of it is fear and lies planted by the enemy himself. We have a choice to believe the lies, water them, and let them take root or treat them like the weeds they are. Uprooting them, never allowing them to hinder Gods beautiful work within us.

Fear of not being accepted for who you are in the present. 

Fear of not being enough. 

Fear of marital betrayal. 

Fear of not looking like or being as thin as someone else. 

Fear of not fitting in.

Fear of never being loved. 

Unpack your baggage, sister!

What are you afraid of?

What lies have taken hold?

Can you control the lies?

Can you control what (insert name) thinks of you?

Can you control that you’ll never be enough in (insert name)’s eyes?

The answer is no!

Take a step back and challenge yourself to control the controllable! 

Let go of constantly trying to measure up. 

Take hold of who you are in Him. 

A masterpiece, fearfully and wonderfully made, formed in your mother’s womb, created for a purpose. 

Once an orphan, a daughter of the King, now adopted for His holy priesthood. 

Isn’t that enough?

What happens when we lay it all down...the lies, the striving, the fear, the insecurity?

What happens when we trust that His ways are better, worthy, purposeful, enough. 

Peace, that’s what you’ll find, sweet sister friend! A childlike, unfailing peace that God intended for us to have before Satan entered the garden. 

Can I invite you to take a hard look at the baggage you carry?

Unpack it bit by bit. 

Challenge it, comb through it, sort it out into piles if you have to.

What’s the driving force behind the striving?

Will you allow God to be the only god in your life? Will you allow Him to mend those broken pieces and put them back together His way once and for all?

Sister friend, we weren't made to loathe the image in the mirror, strive for anything other than who He sees us to be.

Bless and release, lean in.

You are LOVED!